1/12/2011

WikiLeaks? Is that some kind of diaper or something?

Let's be honest here. If you're reading my blog you aren't a worldly scholar or noble laureate or something. Chances are you eeked your way through school and maybe haven't even showered yet today. In fact, you're probably wearing sweatpants right now, aren't you? YOU ARE! Gross.

Well, don't worry. I'm happy you're here. It's bums like you that keep me in business. Granted this makes me no money but one day if I hit it big writing... blogs... with... no... theme... Nevermind. The point is, I'm here for YOU. I want to help my reader, not only entertain them. So this post is gonna be informative, educational and perhaps for some of you a real eye opener.

So now you're probably wondering "What could she know that I don't know"? Well, a lot, actually. I know how to hand code Javascript. Do you know how to hand code Javascript? Haha you don't? Pathetic.

That doesn't really matter though. I'm not going to teach you Javascript. Knowing you, you'd probably use it to sell drugs or something. What i'm going to teach you, you'll be able to share with your friends, loved ones, even the guy standing next to you in line at McDonalds (don't kid yourself, you're not fooling anybody. We've seen you there and we've also discussed it).

So spit it out already, Lauren! (is what you're thinking...)

WikiLeaks.

What the fuck, am I right?

It's like, everybody's talking about them but nobody really knows what they are. Or WHO??? No, what. Definitely what.

You've probably skimmed over articles about them on your google feed or in the daily paper but with all these trips to McDonalds and hemming your sweatpants, WHO HAS THE TIME???

Ok so... WikiLeaks. Let's break it down. You know about Wikipedia. You know what a leak is. So it's probably like, the wikipedia website leaking? Not so quick... There's more to it. You ready for it? Here we go... Wait for it... Wait for it...

Wikileaks was a website that published anonymous submissions and leaks of sensitive governmental, corporate, organizational, or religious documents, while attempting to preserve the anonymity and untraceability of its contributors.

BAM.

There you have it. That's all there is. No, there isn't anything else. Julian Assange? No he was just the guy who like, registered the website or whatever. Or no, he was like, the guy who is like, he came up with the term Wikileak i think. Yea, for sure actually. I'm 99% sure.

So that's it! You're welcome, you guys. Now you can go back to trying to get that piece of popcorn kernel from between your two back teeth with your tongue.

Next week, we discuss National Security.

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